Sharing custody is a challenge. You have to see your ex all the time and constantly remember when you will or won’t have parenting time.
If there’s anything harder than the general practice of splitting parental responsibilities with your ex, it is probably the possibility that you won’t get to spend important days with your children. Birthdays and holidays are times when family members connect with one another.
How do you handle those special days in your parenting plan?
You can alternate them
Some parents choose to celebrate every other holiday or birthday with their children. This approach could be a good solution in high-conflict scenarios where parents have a hard time interacting after the divorce.
They might even celebrate the next day with the other parent. For some children, the promise of two birthday parties can make up for only having one parent there on the actual day.
Splitting the day in half
Especially if the birthday or holiday falls in the summer or on a weekend, parents can agree that the child spends half of the day with each of them. They might even plan the actual party or family get-together in the middle of the day so that everyone is present and the custody change occurs at the end of the celebration.
Sharing those special days
For the children, having everyone get together like they used to will usually be the preferable option. If parents can cooperate and keep things pleasant, sharing those special days by celebrating together could be good for the whole family.
Considering all of your options for shared custody can help you and your ex and work together better as co-parents.