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How to keep kids from playing one parent against the other after a divorce

On Behalf of | Apr 14, 2022 | Child Custody

Children will sometimes do whatever they can to get what they want. This sometimes involves playing one parent against the other. When the parents live in the same home, this might be evident quickly. Divorced parents might not realize what’s going on as quickly. 

There are several things that parents can do to try to thwart the child’s efforts to play their parents against each other. Consider these tips if you’re dealing with this:

Open communication lines with your ex

One of the most effective ways to combat this is to let the children see that both parents are communicating about things related to the kids. They’ll be a little more reluctant to try to get one parent to agree to something the other parent already said no to if they know that the adults are speaking to each other. 

Establish some consistent rules in both households

Certain aspects of the child’s life, such as the curfew they have to follow, might work better if they’re consistent between homes. Working with your co-parent on things like curfews and expectations for things like grades and behavior enables you to clearly convey to the children what’s acceptable. 

Parents can combat some of the antics the children might try by having a parenting plan that clearly outlines the major decisions about the kids. Because these issues might lead the parents to have disagreements, having dispute resolution methods in the plan is beneficial. Everything in the parenting plan and the schedule must be what’s best for the children right now. In the future, modifications are possible if their needs change.